Those words still sound weird. It sounds fake. Like when you say “the sky is purple” with a straight face…you can say it, you know what it means, but it’s almost absurd that it could never be real. My 8-week old can’t have cancer. Chemo is for adults…even older kids…not my newborn.
But here I am, in a hospital room, after his second round of chemo. CHEMO. Ya know, the scary word you hear along side a photo of a bald woman who looks like she is wasting away she is so sick— chemo.
There are times I have accepted that he has cancer, and I am able to look at the positives of his treatment and our situation. But there are still moments where this just can’t be real. Where I look up, and it feels like a dream and that I am very ready to wake up from.
But well-adjusted or freaking out, life is still moving forward. It’s hard to comprehend when something like this changes everything how the rest of the world goes on as normal. It does though and I am thankful. People around me living their lives, us having to go through the routine for my other child, and the fact that the world really hasn’t ended, gives me hope that one day our world will be back to normal again.