My oldest child turns three today…
We are not with her though. Instead of a trip to the park and lunch for her and her friends, I spent five hours in the infusion clinic while the baby got his second month of chemo treatment.
I’m fighting a feeling of bitterness. That this is just one more thing this cancer is taking away from us. The funny thing is I love birthday celebrations but I never before had really taken much value in it having to be a specific day. I’ve always gone by the theory that as long as someone gets birthday love, it’s not the day that matters.
But, of course, you want what you can’t have. The day matters, because I can’t have it…and I have the emotional strength of a peanut these days.
Okay. No more entertaining the bitterness. Instead focusing on the good. So here is the good: Last Saturday the little girl, my husband, and I had a great Saturday just having fun and focusing on her. It was a day filled with sugar and smiles. First a trip to the donut store, then to John’s Incredible Pizza, and then to Leatherby’s Ice Cream.
It was a good day. A great day. We are so lucky we got it.