No More Perfect Jen: Confidence vs. Pride

No More Perfect Jen title slide

Distinguishing pride from confidence is not easy. Pride leads to anger.  Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering…

Okay, some of that was about using the force, but the point is: pride is bad and confidence good.

“Shouldn’t we be able to feel confident without that confidence being prideful? Absolutely. There is a difference between pride and self-confidence. Pride demands a voice. Self-confidence is quiet, undemanding, and unassuming. Pride believes you are better. Self-confidence believes you are capable. Pride is about taking. Self-confidence is about offering.”

I LOVE THAT.

Pride demands a voice. Self-confidence is quiet, undemanding, and unassuming.

Pride believes you are better. Self-confidence believes you are capable.

Pride is about taking. Self-confidence is about offering

Think about that for a moment…

Okay, now moving on.

Parenting!  My dense little self, never even considered how that played in my parenting.

Jill Savage has nailed it:

“So how do pride or self confidence play out in my daily life as a mom? Pride demands that situations be handled my way at my moms group. Self-confidence respects the leaders and guidelines established for the group, and it doesn’t take difficult situations personally. Pride sees only how my child was wronged in a situation. Self confidence realizes that my child could have been just as wrong as another child or could have contributed to a difficult situation at school. Pride demands that I be lauded for my efforts as a volunteer or employee. Self- confidence performs the job confidently without expecting a pat on the back.”

I especially liked the, “Pride sees only how my child was wronged in a situation. Self confidence realizes that my child could have been just as wrong as another child or could have contributed to a difficult situation at school.”

Pride believes your child is better than everyone else. Confidence believes they are capable of being great but also knowing that they are human. One of my pet peeves these days (I have lots of them actually) are all these letters and Pinterest images of parents berating their child’s future boyfriend/girlfriend or spouse about their actions, essentially negating all responsibility on behalf of their child.

Savage brings up a good overreaching point though. Confidence and pride play a huge role in parenting.

When I discipline my child- is it out of pride or confidence? Does it come out of my own insecurity or embarrassment, or am teaching proper behavior that will get them through life?

When I teach my child about themselves- is it about pride or confidence? Am I teaching her to feel superior to those around her, or have confidence that she is capable and can do whatever she puts her mind to?

When I help my child- is it  for pride or confidence? Am I making something for them so it can be the best in the class, or am I helping them with their project so they can reach their highest potential no matter the results?

Some questions for you to choose from (or not) in the comments below. Remember for every comment if you leave a name & email you will get entered to win a free copy of No More Perfect Moms:

1) If you are a parent, where are you prideful in your parenting?

2) Did one of these strike you in a particular way:

“Pride demands a voice. Self-confidence is quiet, undemanding, and unassuming. Pride believes you are better. Self-confidence believes you are capable. Pride is about taking. Self-confidence is about offering.”

3) How do you distinguish the line between pride and confidence in your own life?

4) Or just say hi!

Advertisements

One thought on “No More Perfect Jen: Confidence vs. Pride

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s